Who's Missing From Your Network?

Most of us don’t mean to work in silos - but our calendars and inboxes quietly build them for us. 

In this episode, Jessica and Erin guide you through a five-minute exercise to map your work relationships, notice who’s missing, and take one small step outside your silo this month.

We get busy, go to the people we already know, and stay in our lanes. In this episode of Practicing Connection, hosts Jessica and Erin walk you through a simple, five-minute exercise to map your work network and make the invisible visible.

You’ll list the people you’ve talked with about work over the past month, then explore patterns across sectors, roles, geography, and experience. Along the way, you’ll surface quiet assumptions, notice who’s overrepresented, and identify whose voices are missing from your conversations.

Finally, Jessica and Erin invite you to choose just one gap to focus on this month—and to reach out for one conversation that takes you a step outside your silo. It’s a gentle, practical way to start building a more intentional, inclusive network that strengthens your work and your community.

LinkedIn Practice:

If you’re working to solve complex problems or serve a community, who’s not in your network matters.

What’s one gap you notice in your own network right now?

Links and resources from this episode:

• Join our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/ 
• Send us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org 

Transcript

JESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Think about the last five people you talked to or collaborated with on your work. 

You’ve got them in mind?

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Now ask yourself, do they all work in the same sector as you, the same organization, same type of role?

JESSICA BECKENDORF: If the answer is yes, you might be working in more of a silo than you know.

- intro -

Welcome to Practicing Connection. I'm Jessica.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: And I'm Erin. Today we're giving you a short practice-based episode, where we give you something you can actually do to strengthen connections in your work and in your community.

JESSICA BECKENDORF: And today we're talking about something that sounds kind of obvious, but can actually be really hard: to see the shape of your network.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Ooh. I'm gonna be honest. I don't even think about the shape of my network at all, so I'm glad you're bringing this forward. Because I don't conceptualize it as a shape at all. So that's [00:01:00] super fun. But I'm guessing that we're talking also about the kinds of people who are in our network?

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. It's like, is it lopsided in ways that we don't want it to be lopsided?

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Okay. Sure. That makes sense. You know, I think most of the time you don't wake up and say to yourself, “Well, I'm only going to talk to people who already do exactly what I do, and think exactly what I think.” But I imagine that happens pretty easily. It certainly has with me in the past, where you get busy and it feels good to have somebody agree with you. And maybe you're avoiding conflict if you're a mid-westerner. 

And then you just kind of stay in your lane.

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. Yeah. And sometimes we stay in our lanes because of that time issue, like you were saying. And before you know it, you are operating in a silo, right. And being in Wisconsin, I guess, many of us operate in silos naturally. 

I'm just kidding. Terrible joke. 

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Nah, we love farmers. Don't fret.

JESSICA BECKENDORF: We do, we do. But [00:02:00] seriously, before you know it, you're operating in a silo, right? You're solving problems with the same few people. 

You're hearing the same perspectives, and you might be missing entire groups of people who are working on the same issues that you are, but they're working on it from a different lens or a different experience, or different part of the community or state.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Okay, so today's practice is about making the invisible visible. We're going to walk you through a simple exercise to map your network and spot the gaps.

JESSICA BECKENDORF: And then we'll talk about what to do with that information, because awareness without action is just, I guess, it's just sort of interesting.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: That's nicer than I would've said. Sure. A very diplomatic action is good. All right. How do we get to the action?

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Okay, here's what you'll need: 

A piece of paper, a pen, and if you're MacGyver, maybe a rubber band and a nail. No, I'm kidding. 

[00:03:00] You need a piece of paper, a pen, and about five minutes of uninterrupted time, maybe 10 at the most. You could do this right now if you want to pause us along the way, or you can do it later. It's totally up to you.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: And full transparency, this might feel a little uncomfortable. You might notice things that you wish were different. That's okay. And that's actually the point.

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah, we're not here to judge your network, and you shouldn't either. Just be open to seeing it more clearly so that you can be more intentional about where you build your network in the future.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: All right, let's walk through it.

JESSICA BECKENDORF: All right. 

First step, make a list of the people you've talked to about work in the last month. The people that you've talked to substantially, right? Maybe you've even collaborated with them on something. 

It's not just meetings. Include things like emails, phone calls, coffee conversations, text threads, anyone that you've engaged with about your work.

So you're making this list.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: [00:04:00] And you don't need to overthink it. Just write down the names that come up for you, and aim for at least 10 to 15 people if you can.

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Once you've got your list, move to step two. This is where you're going to look at patterns. If it's easier, you could, if you're like me, you could find a way to visually see these patterns by using color coding or symbols. But if you do that, just make sure that you create a key, so that you know what it all means later on.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Are you speaking from practice, Jessica?

JESSICA BECKENDORF: I am speaking from experience. Yes. But you don't have to do it that way. You can really just consider our questions while you're looking at your list. That's totally fine too. And write down your observations, on the side. 

So we'll start by posing some questions, and I want you to just look at your list of names that you just came up with, and just notice what comes up as we ask these questions.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Okay. The first question, “What sectors or fields are [00:05:00] represented?” Are they mostly nonprofits? Government education, private sector, faith-based, military connected.

JESSICA BECKENDORF: - Not military connected.

So just look at your list and consider what's overrepresented for your context. What's overrepresented, and what might be missing entirely.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: And the next question, “What roles do these people have?” Are they mostly peers or people who do similar work to you, or are there supervisors, funders, directors, community members, frontline staff, people with direct experience of the issues you're working on?

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Again, just notice, who's on the list? Who's not on the list? Whatever matters for your context, for the work you do, who's there, and who should be there but isn't.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Third question. “What about [00:06:00] geography?” Are you talking to people mostly in your town, in your county, in your state? Are there rural voices? Are there urban voices? Are there suburban voices?

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Here's a big one: “Are you talking to people most impacted by the issues you're working on, or are you mostly talking to other professionals about them?” What's important for your role and for the people you serve? Just notice what you notice.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Okay. Now take a breath and look at your list again. What stands out to you?

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Maybe you're really connected across sectors, but everyone's in leadership roles. Maybe you talk to lots of peers, but no one from the communities you serve. Maybe your network is geographically narrow for the work you do. Where is your network rich and where might it be homogenous? 

There's no perfect network, but there are intentional networks, and that's what we're aiming for. 

So now that you've mapped [00:07:00] it, here are a few reflection questions for you to sit with a bit.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Question one. Where are my silos invisible to me? What perspectives am I not hearing from? Because I'm not in a relationship with people who hold them.

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Question two, if I'm trying to solve a problem or serve a community whose voice is missing from my network and how does that limit my effectiveness? 

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: On question three, what's the gap? I could start to close this month?

JESSICA BECKENDORF: And I want to emphasize: one gap, just one, Not, what are all the gaps that I could start to close this month? One gap. 

You know, that's all we're asking for. I really don't want to overwhelm anyone who are trying to develop the perfect network, because they notice that there's a whole bunch of gaps in their network.

The perfect network doesn't exist, like I already said. So choose one gap that you noticed. Maybe it's a sector you don't know [00:08:00] well. Maybe it's a type of role you don't usually engage with. Maybe it's a community you serve, but you don't have many relationships in.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: And then reach out to one person in that gap just to learn. You could say something like, “I realized I don't know much about the work that you do, and I'd love to understand it better. Would you be up for that conversation sometime?”

JESSICA BECKENDORF: And that's it. I mean, I've said this before, that change happens one conversation at a time, and I really do believe that. 

But in this case, in this context, one conversation can mean one step outside your silo. And what I think is most exciting about this is that when you start to step out of your silo like this, you're not just expanding your network. You're sowing the seeds of becoming a network weaver, and making collaboration and resource sharing easier and more possible. 

It's not going to make your work harder, but it does take these moments of stepping out.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah, I can [00:09:00] see that. I think this also can help you model something to other people on your team, or maybe in your circle that you collaborate with, that it's worth the effort to reach out and learn from each other. 

I don't know how much we've touched on it here, but part of the goal of helping you to notice where the gaps are in your network, it's not just to give you more work to do, right? We're not here trying to make your life harder. 

But because genuinely hearing more perspectives helps you be better at your work, and sometimes it makes your work easier, and sometimes you can solve problems that you didn't think could ever be solved when you start talking with new kinds of people about it.

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. So their needs stay close to the top of your mind. Your needs stay close to the top of their mind. 

You might meet someone else, and you realize, “Oh, I know just the person to connect you with and you close that triangle.” 

And you introduce people, and that's sort of how all of this, you know, grows. And [00:10:00] it's how our jobs can be made easier, by spending a little bit of upfront time to get to know each other, and find out where those resources are.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: I love that. Okay. I know, I know, we're trying to be very on track. And also if you have never had the high of connecting two people who don't know each other and having them be a perfect fit, and then them doing really cool stuff, you've never worked for extension as a community educator! But like you just don't know that professional high.

It is so satisfying. Whether it's like connecting someone with a mentor, or a project partner, or helping somebody get a job, it is so satisfying. This is what makes networking worth it. 

For me, I'm not a big small talk person necessarily. I love talking about weird stuff and deep stuff, but small talk is sometimes not my favorite.

And I can see how having the kind of small talk, “What's going on with you,” conversations have led [00:11:00] to some of the most interesting deep conversations. But you’ve got to know where the deep waters are before you can dive into 'em. Right?

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Right. And you know what, I do think in a future episode, we should talk about the difference between network building and networking, because those are two different things.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah. 

JESSICA BECKENDORF: So, yeah. We'll handle that in a future episode. 

But that's it for today's episode, and we'd really love to hear from you, about how this went.

What did you notice when you mapped your network? What gaps maybe surprised you? You can reach us at practicingconnection@oneop.org.

ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: And you can click the share button in your podcast app to share this with a friend or a coworker. 

We'll be back next week. Until then, keep practicing.

[00:12:00]

CREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Op and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.