Build Team Cohesion with "Hippopotamus Days"

What if a single phrase could transform your team’s understanding and support for each other on tough days? 

Discover how “Hippopotamus Days” can build connection, understanding, and trust - one inside joke at a time.

Building team cohesion isn’t just about big events or trust falls - it’s about the small moments of understanding that bring people together. 

In this episode of Practicing Connection, Coral and Jessica introduce the concept of “Hippopotamus Days,” a playful, team-created code word that signals when someone’s having an off day but still wants to be present. 

Learn how developing a shared language and group norms can foster empathy, reduce misunderstandings, and make your team stronger - even on the toughest days. Tune in for practical steps to create your own team phrase and see how humor and honesty can become powerful tools for connection.

Transcript

[00:00:00] CORAL OWEN: Hey everyone. Thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I'm Coral, my co-host Jessica is here today as well. Today we'll be talking about building team cohesion with an outside the box practice called “Hippopotamus Days.” Jessica's gonna be sharing that practice with us. Hey Jess. How are you today?

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Hi, Coral. I'm doing pretty good. I have to confess, I can't wait to get back to the book I'm reading. Of course I always enjoy hanging out on the podcast with you, but I just started reading novels again, and now I remember why my dad was always saying, “Get your nose out of that book and go outside to play!” Because once I start a book that grabs my attention, I don't like to stop.

CORAL OWEN: I totally get that. I was definitely the kid growing up where my folks would knock on my door at like 11:30 at night and I'd just have my nose buried in a book for like the last two hours. They'd be like, “You need to go to bed.” So, you know, with the limited time I have these days as a mom to an almost 3-year-old, and lots of life stuff, I unfortunately don't get to [00:01:00] dig into those books for the long periods of time that don't exist right now. But looking forward to that season again soon, hopefully.

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Did you keep a flashlight nearby so that you could put the covers over your head and turn a flashlight on?

CORAL OWEN: Oh, I sure did. I sure did.

JESSICA BECKENDORF: I mean, that's, I could have been doing a lot worse things, right. So -

CORAL OWEN: Absolutely. Absolutely. So I know that we've got a lot of readers in our listenership and you know, if y'all are reading anything or coming across anything in your life, we would love to hear about what is inspiring you or sparking different lines of trains of thought.

So don't ever hesitate to share what's inspiring you at the moment with us. And you can click the “Send us a text message” button at the top of this description of this episode. When you click that link, your text messaging app will open. You'll see a seven digit number, the words “Do not remove.” Just drop your message in there and click send afterwards.

If you're listening on the computer, you can also just drop us an email to practicing connection@oneup.org. So hopefully, you're [00:02:00] feeling inspired and you can let us know what's inspiring you right now.

- break -

CORAL OWEN: All right, so let's learn more about building team cohesion with “hippopotamus days.” I love the name of this practice, Jessica. I can't wait to learn more about it. Can you share more about this practice that you'll be sharing and also why you chose it?

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. I am actually super excited to share this practice with you. As you know, before we started recording, you and I were actually talking that this episode was gonna be a completely different episode, and then I told you about hippopotamus days, and I'm like, “I think I'd like to create a practice around this.”

So I call this practice Hippopotamus Day in honor of a group I was working with, where their chosen code phrase to describe that they were, actually it was to describe several things. It was to describe that they were having a bad day, but that they're okay. That they promised to be present, but they may not be as communicative as usual, they might be off camera.

This one phrase, hippopotamus day, [00:03:00] encapsulated a whole bunch of things. And so it was, “I am having a hippopotamus day,” is what people would share, when and if they felt the need to share that. And the result was everyone immediately understood, because we all had decided on that phrase at the beginning of our time together, and we immediately understood that this person needed some space. And we also immediately understood that they were not checking out, that they were there and present with us, and that just because their camera was off or just because they were not maybe speaking up as much as usual, they were still with us and they were listening. Because it was sort of like a social contract that we had all agreed on. 

So at its core, this is about a shared language that is internal to your team to describe something that bridges understanding. So did your coworker nod at you instead of smiling and saying, hello?

Are they not speaking up during a [00:04:00] meeting? Maybe they're having a hippopotamus day. So without some sort of shared language, we might assume our coworker is frustrated with us. In our minds, we might try to recall the last several interactions we had, to see if we can pinpoint why they seem so frustrated, and we might even get frustrated in the process.

So shared language can help us build understanding and simplify the complexities of life. I almost said simplify the complexities of work life, but actually it's kind of also about simplifying the complexities of life, right? We don't leave the rest of our lives, you know, when we walk into our office. We are whole people, right?

So for example, the group I was working with that used the phrase, “I'm having a hippopotamus day,” they used it in a way that helped describe several things at once. But beyond simplifying complex concepts, the shared language can also have the effect of building team cohesion. So I would even argue that using humor [00:05:00] in your language choices also helps. Like for example, hippopotamus is a funny word to say, and it's funny to hear in relation to describing a bad day.

CORAL OWEN: I love that so much and you know, when we can bring an angle of humor or just lightheartedness to something that might otherwise be a bit of a downer or kind of a, hmm, you know, interaction. I think that just helps bring the energy up and it just gives us a little bit of a reprieve. So awesome. Can you just tell us how to get started, like, where would we even start to begin creating something like a hippopotamus day for our own teams?

JESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah, it's a pretty easy practice, but it will take a bit of discussion with your team, right. Just instituting a top-down hippopotamus day decree is probably not going to work very well, right? 'Cause this is about a shared language. So I recommend that you gain group consensus on the language that you [00:06:00] choose, and I also recommend that your team creates their version of a hippopotamus day, while you're creating group agreements or team norms, if you don't already have them. If you already have them, just append it with a hippopotamus day. So group agreements, in case you don't have them, they are essentially a set of guidelines that your team has agreed to for how you'll show up together as a team and for how you'll collaborate together.

So for this particular practice, let's focus on creating your team's own version of a hippopotamus day, So, first, during a team meeting, set an agenda item to discuss team communication. You could have it as a simple item on your agenda that just says, “Team communication discussion.”

Number two, the concept of a hippopotamus day. Basically that it is a shorthand communication to describe that a person is having an off day, to build understanding among the team. You might ask your team as you're [00:07:00] trying to come up with what your own version of hippopotamus, ask them what does that mean for us? If someone is having an off day, do we want to define it as that they need space? Or do we want to define it as they need support? Can your team member who's having this off day show up with their camera off, if you happen to be in a remote situation? What are the guidelines around what your hippopotamus day means to your team. 

Then step three, choose your team language to describe the group norm. You can use hippopotamus day if you like. I have also heard, Capuchin Monkey Day. My friend and I use platypus as our word, and I've even heard Whirly Gig. So I recommend making this phrase a little quirky and letting your team have fun with it.

And then the last step is to use the word [00:08:00] or phrase. If you're the leader, model it. Ask team members, “Is this a hippopotamus day?” And then when they say yes, if they say yes, say, “Okay, I respect that,” and respect what your team developed as their definition of hippopotamus day. 

So while you're getting used to it, as the leader, you might need to start to use it yourself. So what I've seen happen once a group grabs onto the concept and starts using it, I've seen that it builds togetherness and understanding when someone is feeling off, and that is really powerful. 

CORAL OWEN: I just love this, and I could even see an evolution for teams if they just love this and run with it, to even have, you know, perhaps a couple different flavors. They could choose from maybe like a “Domingo day” if they're feeling like, you know, just extra with it. But yeah, what a fun practice for something that can sometimes be a little bit difficult, when we're showing up as that whole person with a whole suite of emotions. So thanks [00:09:00] for sharing that, Jess. Really appreciate it.

JESSICA BECKENDORF: And I love what you just said with the flamingo day. Can you imagine, right, if someone mentions they're having a hippopotamus day and someone else is like, “You know what? That's okay. I'm having a flamingo day. I got you.” Like, I can help you out. Like I can bring up the energy right now, and not force you to bring up your energy.

CORAL OWEN: Yeah, absolutely. Awesome. That's about it for this episode, but thanks again Jess, for such a fun conversation, and thank you all for joining us. 

If you enjoyed this episode or if you're even thinking about implementing it with your team, click the share button in your podcast app to share it with a friend or a colleague, and we will be back next week with a new practice.

Until then. Keep practicing.

CREDITS: The Practicing Connection podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture, U. S. Department of Agriculture, and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy, U. S. Department of Defense, under award number 2023-48770-41333.